so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
and you fell through a lawn chair
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
