The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
