Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
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