Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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