Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
