They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
