U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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