Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
whose parrot is this?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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