dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
