You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
