Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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