so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
