your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
