so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize