Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
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