she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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