I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
