I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
