if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
