At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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