That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
