Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
