The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
