I'm drive I can fine osifer
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
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