i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
