You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Church boner. Awkwardddd
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
