My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
