Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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