god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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