He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
is it fun? or sober?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
