Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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