It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
apparently the secret to your success is patron
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize