Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
