I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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