We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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