Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize