I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize
