dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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