Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
