I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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