He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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