Nicole vs. Life
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
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