Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
