I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
