Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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