i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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