I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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