I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
You need a sexual gate keeper
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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