Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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