She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
