I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I just googled if crying burns calories
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
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